A peaceful night. A being moves closer to the arbiter and initiates a conversation with her.
S: I don't understand myself anymore. Why do I follow you? It seems that all you preach is just darkness and death and hopelessness. That's not the essence of life or existence at all. It is a part of it yes. But not all of it. And yet I find it difficult to just leave you behind.
A: Well. You are always free to enter into a new body and follow a different "faith", if that's the word you're referring to. If you believe that a fresh message is more suitable to you.
Of course the Buddhists will tell you, that your ego is clouding your judgement and you yourself are at fault for your misery, because you're attached to impermanent phenomena. Of course they wouldn't use the word "at fault" or blame of any kind. They'd call it "responsibility". Sounds cleaner. Wouldn't want anyone to think you're secretly gaslighting your own Sangha here.
The Christians will tell you, that someone you never met died for the sins you didn't get a chance to commit, because you hadn't been born yet and that therefore you should live your life in atonement of those sins. And to also give them money. Every week.
The Taoists will tell you, that the world is actually perfect just the way it is and that you're just waaay too attached to the lack of torture, depression and suffering in your life, so you can't see it's eternal perfection in the blood of your loved ones.
The Hindus will tell you, that you're just part of a big dream of a vast and expansive consciousness and if you happen to get caught in a nightmare it's ultimately irrelevant, because you're just an unlucky bastard who happened to be an asshole in his previous life and you're now trapped in the universal center of that asshole's reborn perspective.
The Shinto followers will tell you, that your ancestors and evil spirits are poisoning your mind and with the right ceremony and/or peace offering you'll be fresh as a daisy again.
Personally I don't know much about Muslims. Maybe try that. I'm curious about what they're up to.
S: Why are you so cynical about those perspectives? You must have experienced the vastness of consciousness and its ability to give rise to all things. You make it seem like all of these ideas are ridiculous, when they are in fact artful metaphorical attempts at connecting these spiritual experiences with their followers' daily lives.
A: If I'm too cynical for your taste then why do you listen to a single word I say? You were rich in your previous life. You had everything and never even encountered an act of mortal violence. I have beings, who got their heads cut off around here. What was it with you? Some light depression? Difficulty getting up in the morning? If you're still full of light, there's no need to follow me around like a confused puppy.
S: That's right. I did have it better than others. The reason I stay is, that you don't hand out blame. If I understand you correctly, you believe that responsibility for ones actions only goes as far as a drowning man can be held responsible for what he grasps for. In a sense you preach forgiveness.
A: We're all drowning. We're all bleeding. Some of us quicker than others. Some of us have learned to deal with it, to accept it. Others have not. It is cruel to put a mirror in front of a dying man and expose his shame in order to blame him for his own misfortune.
S: You're referring to the king?
A: Who else? He jerks himself off over his own "sacrifice". "Look at me, I refrain from becoming a god, so I can guide you freaks towards the next mudpit". It's sickening.
S: But he must earnestly believe in what he does. To me this does in fact sound like a true sacrifice.
A: He believes, because he has to. Sunk cost fallacy is a thing in the afterlife as well. Can you imagine what would happen to his mind, if he realized he was wrong? The damage done to all of these beings ... the horrors he put them through ... just for the sake of teaching a new useless lesson.
S: The way I understand it, is that the lesson to learn is "love for one another". Regardless of what form this love takes and regardless of what type of being that love is directed towards. We are connected on a deeper level. When I first arrived here I felt incredibly relieved ... I was no longer bound by my physical form, yet I felt like myself. This connection that we all share ... it is something we rarely become aware of when we inhabit a physical body. If we are to exist in a dual reality, we must learn to deal with the absence of love as well.
A: Have you?
S: Have I what?
A: Have you learned to "deal with it"?
S: ... it's easier here. It's very difficult to do it over there.
A: That's right. Because "over there" is broken.
S: But isn't that kind of an ungrateful perspective? We receive the chance to experience the beauty of a million stars ... of falling in love ... bearing a child and raising it ... experiencing new worlds, new realms, countless dreams. Yes one can see everything from the perspective of decay. But you can also see it from the perspective of a stargazer.
A: Oh my. You're a romantic. When the light of those stars reached your retinas, those same stars had already died. You can sit there and look at the stars and marvel at the wonders of space and time. But you're admiring a lie. And that's not your fault. It is baked into the system. That is WHY it is broken. When Buddhists speak of suffering and impermanence they're not kidding. They understood the nature of reality and that we're all ultimately fucked. You aren't supposed to experience peace over there. You are supposed to struggle to extend your stay in that place. Or you can decide to not extend it, and then you come over here and the asshole in a black robe sends you right back where you came from. There is no escape. That's why it needs to end entirely.
S: But what if at some point we all achieve peace over there? Let's say we learn to embrace duality and work towards a universe that does have room for suffering, but where suffering is no longer central. What if we are able to transcend it at some point? What if we learn to accept the things we can't change and develop empathy for one another? Every act of kindness reverberates throughout space and time. Every being that overcomes its own darkness opens the door for countless others that will succeed it.
A: You have faith. I don't. This is where we are ultimately different.
S: But shouldn't you at the very least give creation a chance to fix itself? To evolve? To develop? Before you throw it all under the bus?
A: Whether creation deserves a chance is not up to me. All I can do is follow what I believe is right. My choice is to work towards an ending of this existence. This choice was born from experience of that very same existence. I said it to him and I will say it to you: If your vision of this universe is accurate, then this system will defend itself successfully. If you're wrong ... then it had no reason to be here in the first place. I am merely a catalyser speeding up the process.
S: But you're doing it for egocentric reasons ... just because you can't bear existence, doesn't mean that all existence has to end.
A: You said it yourself. We are all connected. If you're advocating for the continuation of existence, because some forms of existence may not have it as bad as others, you are a massive part of the problem. Your curiosity drives you into a loop of permanent suffering. And by following it willingly you're also condemning all other beings to that same fate.
S: But we enter this world based on our own volition!
A: Is that so?
(The arbiter manifests a bronze cage in front of the being)
A: Go on then. Choose.
(The arbiter opens the cage door, beckoning the light being to enter)
S: ...
A: It's fine. I'll bring you to him in person. It'll be like a ... ride "to the farm upstate".
S: ...
(the being hesitates)
A: I thought so.
(the arbiter slams the cage shut)
A: Not so funny when you actually have to act on it.
S: Doesn't that make us cowards?
A: Is a man bravely smashing his own head with a hammer, so he can see the stars worth admiring?
S: I think your metaphors are inaccurate and deceptive.
A: Think what you will. Stay. Leave. It makes no difference. But I enjoyed our little conversation tonight.
S: So did I.
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